Welcome!  Today’s episode is about Holidays.  Where will you spend them?  Have you and your spouse had this important conversation?  This topic involves the expectations you have of your marriage and ties to family beliefs and traditions.  There are several variables to consider:  stepfamilies, geographic location, travel, and children.  This topic is best addressed before marriage and is certainly one that requires couples to work together.

Consider the following about your holiday plans:

• Assess what the different holidays and traditions mean to each of you.
• Try to begin new traditions with your partner.  Remember that your marriage relationship comes before any other family ties.
• Once you make decisions, “have each other’s backs” and don’t blame the other partner.
• Negotiate “win-win” situations for both of you.
• “Rate the debate” based on how important each element is to you: 1^st choice, 2^nd choice, and 3^rd choice.
• Establish communication and exercise your problem-solving skills.
• This is NOT the time to be selfish and demanding!

What can you expect if you handle this conversation well?  

• You achieve teamwork and unity with your spouse in the eyes of friends and family.
• You may end up enjoying the family traditions and the bonding opportunities with your spouse’s family.

Listener Question of the Week:  I am really frustrated.  My fiancé and I have been together for several years and have been through many birthdays and holidays.  He likes to give practical gifts, and I like fun, crazy gifts.  What are your recommendations as to what to do?

Fun Question of the Week:  What is your idea of a great gift?

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Have a great week gang!

Jim and Christie

Welcome! Jim is flying solo for this episode because Christie has no voice! This episode is Part 2 in a Four Part Series of questions to ask ourselves individually and collectively, personally and professionally, to make 2016 our BEST YEAR EVER! This is a process that we have used in our family for about ten years now. I hope these questions will help you effectively communicate with each other and build your marriage to last a lifetime!

Last week, we discussed Question #1: What is working in our lives, and how can we do more of it?

This week, here is Question #2: What is NOT working, and how do we get rid of it or make it work?

• This question is the most valuable and the most powerful of the four.
• Another way to look at it is, where are you NOT getting a great ROI?
• This will help you create a plan to limit the problem of over-committing yourselves.
• Jim shares two personal examples to illustrate:
• • Jim’s beloved guitar
  • Selling personal property to fulfill the commitment to eliminate debt

Join us next week as we tackle Question #3. I hope you’ll use this question this week to strengthen your marriage commitment. Have a great week!

Welcome Gang!  I am flying solos today because Christie is under the weather.  In the next 4 weeks we are going to share with you 4 questions in a series called:

We ask individually and collectively and we ask them both personally and professionally.

1. What’s working right now and how do we do more of it?

We want to not only ask what is working, but why is it working right now?  Christie and I have started trying to be more connected lately and we found ourselves asking this very question.  

We want to know why things are good so that we can continue to do more of that.  If we don’t know why, then we don’t know what to do to get the same results.

When you ask these questions, you will find yourself being more connected to your spouse.  So much of our success in our relationships are about being intentional and engaged in the relationship.

Listener Question of the Week:  “If you were going to read one book to improve your relationship in 2016, what book would it be?”