Of all of the habits we have been discussing this series just how important are the spiritual habits we develop? We believe they may be more important than all of the rest!

In this episode of Your Marriage Matters, Jim and Christie Jacobus explore the importance of cultivating spiritual habits within a marriage. They discussed a variety of practices and activities that can enhance the spiritual connection between partners, ultimately leading to a stronger and more fulfilling relationship. Here's a recap of the key points discussed:

1. Reading and Studying Scripture: Jim and Christie emphasized the significance of regularly engaging in the reading and study of scripture as a couple. They highlighted how delving into sacred texts can deepen one's understanding of faith and provide a foundation for spiritual growth within the marriage.

2. Shared Prayer: The hosts stressed the power of shared prayer in fostering a strong spiritual bond between partners. They discussed the benefits of coming together in prayer, emphasizing how it allows couples to seek guidance, express gratitude, and nurture a deeper connection with God.

3. Hanging Out with Godly People: Jim and Christie encouraged couples to surround themselves with like-minded individuals who are committed to their faith. They discussed the importance of spending time with Godly people, as it can provide support, encouragement, and opportunities for spiritual growth within the marriage.

4. Getting Involved in Something God Is Doing: The hosts highlighted the value of actively participating in activities aligned with God's purpose. They discussed how engaging in acts of service, missions, or community involvement can strengthen the couple's spiritual journey and provide opportunities to make a positive impact in the world.

5. Practicing Gratitude Individually and as a Couple: Jim and Christie emphasized the transformative power of practicing gratitude. They discussed how cultivating a habit of gratitude individually and as a couple can foster a positive mindset, deepen appreciation for life's blessings, and enhance the spiritual connection within the marriage.

6. Practicing Forgiveness Towards Each Other and Others: The hosts underscored the importance of forgiveness in nurturing a healthy and harmonious marital relationship. They discussed how extending forgiveness to one another, as well as to others, is a vital spiritual practice that promotes healing, growth, and the restoration of relationships.

7. Engaging in Meaningful Conversations about Faith: Jim and Christie encouraged couples to engage in open and meaningful conversations about their faith. They discussed the value of discussing beliefs, doubts, questions, and experiences, as it allows partners to deepen their understanding of one another's spiritual journeys and strengthen their connection.

8. Embracing Rituals and Traditions with Spiritual Significance: The hosts explored the significance of incorporating rituals and traditions into the marital relationship. They discussed how these practices, such as observing religious holidays or engaging in specific spiritual rituals, can create moments of reverence, reflection, and connection with one's faith.

9. Setting Shared Spiritual Goals: Jim and Christie emphasized the importance of setting shared spiritual goals as a couple. They discussed how defining and working towards common aspirations can create a sense of purpose, unity, and growth in the marriage's spiritual journey.

Throughout the podcast, Jim and Christie shared practical insights, personal anecdotes, and guidance on how to integrate these spiritual habits into a marriage. They emphasized that by embracing these practices, couples can foster a stronger spiritual bond, cultivate a deeper connection with God, and experience a more fulfilling and meaningful life together.

Do you want to learn how to achieve big things in your life without putting your relationship at risk? Well, you're in luck! In this podcast, we reveal the secret behind our success in working together as a couple. We call it the I D E A process, and it's a simple yet powerful tool that can help you achieve your goals without sacrificing your relationship.

I D E A stands for:

• Inspiration
• Discussion
• Education
• Action

We'll guide you through each step and show you how to apply it to both big and small projects. But that's not all! We'll also share some essential ground rules that will improve not only your relationship with each other but also your individual lives.

Whether you're planning a wedding, building a home, or pursuing a career, this podcast is a must-listen for any engaged couple looking to achieve success without compromising their love for each other.

Tune in now and discover how the I D E A process can transform your relationship!

Jim & Christie Jacobus 

What moments in a wedding day are critical to your personal enjoyment and the enjoyment of your guests? 

Well, Jim did a wedding this past weekend and on our way home we started discussing all of the great moments that were had by the couple and the guests and we had so much fun reliving the event we thought ... "why not do a podcast about it"!

So, here are 10 Key Moments In A Wedding Day You Absolutely Want To Get Right"!

We trust you will enjoy! Let us know if you have any questions ... 

PS ... just seriously dating? Still a fun discussion to have!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

What is one of the most important skills a couple can develop to keep their lives together vibrant and exciting? That is learning to create a shared vision for their futures both as individuals and as a couple. 

We always talk about being intentional. In this podcast we discuss how important it is to have:

• A clear mission!
• A clear vision!
• A clear set of shared values!
• A set of goals both individual and as a couple
• And committing to be a great team!

We also encourage you to sit down and go through our Bucket List exercise. Download that exercise on our Facebook page documents section by Clicking Here!

As always we want you to know that we are here for you if we can help in any way and to remind you that YOUR Marriage Matters! 

See ya next week gang ... 

Team Jacobus

Ever wondered what it would be like to be in a relationship with or marry someone who is fully committed to being the best version of themselves and is always growing and improving in every aspect of their life? It would be pretty awesome, don't you think?

There's a quote that we often use to guide our search for the right person to share our life with: "become the person the person you are looking for is looking for." So, if we want to find someone who is always growing, we must also be on that same path ourselves.

In this episode, we will discuss why it is crucial to continually grow and learn, and we will offer numerous ideas on how to achieve it. If you're reading this and listening to YOUR Marriage Matters, you're already on the right track! Let's make personal growth a part of our daily lives.

Remember: "As long as we are learning, we are living...the moment we stop learning is the moment we start to die." We hope you enjoy this podcast as we conclude our series on the 4 Cornerstones of a great life together!

To join the Facebook Group YOUR Marriage Matters, Click Here!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Let's get this straight ... you will have problems, challenges and outright conflicts in your relationship! It is inevitable!!! How you handle them will be the key to the success in your lives moving forward!

Handling them well will actually enhance the strength of your connection as well as creating a deeper level of intimacy you won't be able to ever experience without these skills and principles!

So, here is what you will find in this podcast:

• Conflict is a normal part of a healthy relationship!
• One of our favorite skills - "Rate the Debate"!
• Another of our faves - "Fight NAKED"!
• Some biblical wisdom from Luke 16: 41-42
• And our own personal challenges and victories when it comes to solving challenges we have faced together!

Enjoy the podcast and let us know if we can help you in any way!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Is there any more critical in a relationship than being able to effectively communicate openly and transparently with each other? NOPE!!! There is not!

That is one of the reasons we are constantly doing podcasts about communications, teaching workshops that always include communications and, work very hard about improving our own communications. It is that critical!

In this podcast we:

• Share with you two very important skill sets in the form of our Speaker Checklist and our Listener Checklist. You can Click Here to download our PDF that covers these two skills!
• We will also share with you 10 No No's when it comes to effectively communicating with each other (and the rest of the world for that matter!)
• Have 7 Powerful Communication Tools we all need to be intentional about mastering and using day in and day out!
• Will teach you one of the most powerful techniques we teach in our workshops we call "The Two Chairs".

At the end of the podcast we give you 6 conversations you can use to practice the checklists, avoiding the No No's, the 7 tools and the chairs! Here are the  6 Great Conversations we created just for you: 

1. One thing I would like for us to find common ground on is … 
2. It really hurts my feelings when you … 
3. One thing you could do that would really make me feel loved is ….
4. I would like to see us reduce our spending on … 
5. When it comes to our families could we …
6. The one thing I think would make us a better team is …

Also, in the podcast we referred to one of our favorite tools, The Relational Needs Survey and learning more about making our partner feel loved. Here are the links to the two podcasts about the Relational Needs Assessment! Take the time to do this and watch how your relationship grows!!! 

• Click Here to access the podcast on How To Make Your Partner Feel Loved!
• Click Here to access the podcast on Getting the Most From Your Relational Needs Survey!
• Click Here to download the Relational Needs Survey!

As always, if you have any questions or if we can help in any way please feel free to reach out to us by responding to this podcast post or go on over to our YOUR Marriage Matters Facebook Group!

Be sure and join us next week as we tackle the 2nd most important skill set we all need to develop - solving problems and resolving conflict! 

Click Here To Listen To The Podcast! 

Never ever forget how much YOUR Marriage Matters!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

What better way to answer that question than going straight to two "Nearlywed" couples that are just weeks away from saying :I do" and interview them?

 
Hannah and Austin

 Mindy and Chris

In this week's episode we ask these guys some great, even tough, questions about what their seriously dating and engagement phases have been like! You will hear them answer, very candidly, the following questions:

• Why do you want to get married?
• What have been some of the struggles you have faced while dating and engaged?
• What have been the fun parts of this time in your lives? Any unexpected blessings?
• What, if anything, do you think will be different once you say "I do"?
• Imagine you have been married for 30 years ... what would you want people to say about you individually and as a couple? 
• What is one piece of advice or insight you would want to give our couples out there that are engaged or seriously dating?

This was both a fun interview and a great learning experience. We trust you will enjoy it!

• For your homework this week Click Here to download our discussion on creating a "Bucket List" together!
• And, Click Here to download our Speaker/Listener Checklist to guide you through the discussion above!
• Additionally we encourage you to join our Facebook group by Clicking Here!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Hey gang!

In this podcast episode we preview a series we have entitled The 4 Foundations of A Great Relationship! It is intended to do exactly what the title says. As you are seriously dating or engaged we want you to begin working on the 4 things that will become the backbone of you experiencing everything you hope for if/when you walk down the aisle together to say "I DO"!

We will be covering the following:

• Communication
• Conflict resolution and/or problem solving
• Creating a shared vision
• Committing to being the best version of yourselves both individually and collectively
• And, we have an interview with a few couples that are currently engaged and just months, or weeks, away from saying I DO to get their insights on this very important time in their lives!

We will also be sharing a little bit of our story and how we got here as well as the importance of commitment and intentionality! So, we trust you will enjoy this overview and join us in the weeks to come as we tackle these critical pieces to your success as a couple!

• For your homework this week Click Here to download our discussion on creating a "Bucket List" together!
• And, Click Here to download our Speaker/Listener Checklist to guide you through the discussion above!
• Additionally we encourage you to join our Facebook group by Clicking Here!

Have an awesome week and join us for our podcast on Communication Skills!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Are we excited about you getting married? Yes, we are! Are there reasons to hit the STOP Button on getting married? Absolutely! Are these "life sentences"? Now way! But, if not dealt with before you walk down that aisle and say "I DO" they will cause you a world of hurt. If not dealt with now they could very easily lead to a divorce at a later date.

What are good reasons to hit the STOP Button?

• Addiction
• Abuse
• Response to internal or external pressures
• Thinking marriage will fix your fiancee
• Not having a "non negotiable" met by your future spouse

In this podcast we go into each of these in detail and provide you with some options when it comes to dealing with them. Again, these are not life sentences. As a matter of fact, we have seen some of the strongest marriage we know come out of a couple's dedication to dealing with one or more of these marriage killers!

There are also a handful of reasons to hit the PAUSE Button on your nuptials as well. Meaning we are going to acknowledge these challenges and begin to address them now. The great thing about this approach is it helps us develop our communication and problem skills during our engagement which is a microcosm of what are married life is going to be like together!

There you have it! 5 Reasons To Absolutely Hit the STOP Button On Getting Married!

If you have any questions please let us know. We are always here to help! Here are a couple of things you can do to help us ...

• Click Here to download our Speaker Listener Checklist!
• Click Here to join our Your Marriage Matters Facebook Group!
• If you enjoyed the podcast we would appreciate your giving it a 5 star review! That will help others find it more easily.

Join us next week as we kick off a new series on The 4 Foundations of A Great Relationship!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Why get married? That is a question we have been asking our seriously dating and engaged couples for years. Their answers are as varied as there are colors in a sunset! 

Some of those reasons are clearly well thought through while some give reason for pause. The good reasons do not guarantee success nor do the not so good reasons mean certain failure. That said, it pays to have a serious conversation or two or three or (you get where we are coming from) about the most important decision either of you will make in your adult lives. 

So, in this episode we walk you through what we feel like are great reasons for getting married. It isn't an exhaustive list but it is a pretty good place to start. 

We have also provided you with some tools for this conversation in the form of a brainstorming process we like to use often when we are wanting to go deeper in a conversation. You can use this process for a lot of different decisions you will need to make together.

And, we have provided you with two of our PDF tools as resources for this conversation. You can ... 

• Click Here to download our Reasons To Get Married exercise
• Click Here to download our speaker/Listener Checklist exercise. You can find the podcast for that tool at YMM 

As always we appreciate it if you can share this podcast with your friends and family that you think might benefit! And, go join the Facebook group by Clicking Here! 

We will see you next week when we will cover some really good reasons not to get married or at least think a little more about your decision! 

Always here for you ... 

Jim and Christie @TeamJacobus

We have two awesome things to share with you this week!!!

First, happy Valentine's Day!!! In this podcast we cover the 5 Love Languages and give you some ideas on how to use them to make Valentine's Day, or any day, very special this year!

And then we share with you a new direction we are taking with the YOUR Marriage Matters podcast! We have a new focus we are so excited about so check it out and let us know what you think! 

We appreciate all of your support and are so excited about the new book and the plans we have for you moving forward!

Jim & Christie "Team Jacobus"

What's The One Thing You Can Do To Change the Trajectory of YOUR Marriage? 

Well, when we started thinking about it we couldn't come up with just one ... we came up with four of them!!! Each of these in their own way can make a huge difference in your marriage. If you can, do it together even if you both choose a different one. If your spouse isn't on board then pick one and do it yourself! If either member of the relationship gets better then the marriage gets better!

The four are simple but not necessarily easy. As a matter of fact they can be downright hard. But, they are worth your investment of time and energy. Here are the options:

• #1 - fix your stuff! A lot of the marriages we see are struggling because of childhood trauma/experiences that one or both partners bring into the marriage! Time to grow up, deal with it and put it in the rear view mirror so you can move forward and experience all of the joy and happiness you deserve!!!
• #2 - let's get physical! We aren't challenging anyone to be an olympic athlete, unless of course you can then go for it! We are challenging everyone to commit to being as healthy as they can be! Time to get up off of the couch, put down the fork and invest in being healthy!
• #3 - exercise your brain! In #2 we talk about exercising your body. In this one we talk about how important it is to regularly exercise and stretch our brains! As long as we are learning we are living ... the moment we stop learning is the moment our marriage begins to die!!! Grab an article and read it! Read, or listen, to a book! Subscribe to a podcast ... there's an idea!!! Do something that regularly stimulates your brain to grow and get new ideas!
• #4 - find your tribe! Don't try and go this alone. It is so important for us all to find a group of friends that are in the same stage of life we are in so two wonderful things happen! First, we find out we are not alone and the struggles we have are not unique! Second, we learn from others, and they learn from us, how they have successfully navigated the rough waters we are currently in! Find a tribe you can lean on as you experience marriage together! PS ... we find our tribe at church. We highly recommend it!!!

So, there you have it! 4 powerful strategies you can implement to get grow both individually and as a couple! Let us know what you think and which one you choose!

Here Are Some Marriage Resources for You!!!

When it comes to that last one we wanted to give you some simple and easy to use resources for investing in each other!!! From previous episodes:

• Take the time to learn what makes your spouse feel loved by taking our "Relationship Needs Survey"! This is a real eye opener and will give you the keys to your mates heart! Click Here to access that episode!
• One of the most powerful things a couple can do is to work on creating a "Shared Vision" for their life together! In our episode on the subject we offered a downloadable pdf workbook to help you in the process! Click Here to access that episode and download your own Bucket List Exercise! WARNING ... it could lead to living full time in a RV or some similar life adventure!!!
• One more simple thing you can do to access a great resource is to join our YOUR Marriage Matters Facebook Group where we share a ton of additional information for building a more vibrant, healthy marriage! Click Here to go to our Facebook Group and join in!!!
• Oooooooppppssss! Almost forgot you can grab our book 52 Great Conversations for Building A More Vibrant, Healthy Marriage! Click Here to grab your copy!

"You Are Not Likely To Protect YOUR Marriage If You Don't Believe
There Is Any Danger"

Rick Reynolds - The Affair Recovery Center

Last week we did our podcast on The 5 Early Warning Signs That Your Marriage Could Be In Trouble! A lot of the feedback was ... what can we do to get ahead of these early warning signs?!?

This week we are going to give every 3 strategies, or 3 Great Ways To Invest In Your Marriage! While they are simple, they are by no means easy! Here you go ...

• Invest in YOUR Marriage by ... being a student of yourself! Be open and honest about who you are and who you are not and make the commitment to become the best version of yourself possible. Then be open and honest with your spouse about it and trust they will love you, just as you are, unconditionally!
• Invest in YOUR Marriage by ... becoming a student of your spouse! Know their Love Languages, know their Relational Needs (we have a podcast dedicated to this subject HERE!), know their personality styles, know what is on their Bucket List (yet another podcast on this subject HERE!) and on and on and on! You can never know enough about your spouse!
• Invest in YOUR Marriage by ... becoming a student of marriage! There is so much to know about this subject that you can, and likely will, spend an entire lifetime dedicated to learning more about it! The cool news is that it is THE MOST WORTHWHILE pursuit you will ever undertake!

Understand YOUR Marriage Matters and it is in constant danger if we aren't vigilant in how we protect it!

We love you and appreciate you and we want to see you and your relationship succeed beyond your wildest dreams!

Here are a couple of additional ways you can be proactive!

One more simple thing you can do to access a great resource is to join our YOUR Marriage Matters Facebook Group where we share a ton of additional information for building a more vibrant, healthy marriage! Click Here to go to our Facebook Group and join in!!!

Oooooooppppssss! Almost forgot you can grab our book 52 Great Conversations for Building A More Vibrant, Healthy Marriage! Click Here to grab your copy!

YOUR Marriage, just like your health, has early warning signs when something isn't just right! Identifying what those signs are, looking to see if they are present in your marriage and then taking action to fix them can save you and your partner a whole lot of grief!!!

5 Early Warning Signs YOUR Marriage Could Be In Trouble!!!

In this podcast we look at 5 specific warning signs we look for in the couples we work with. They are ...

• Losing our connection with each other!
• Avoiding spending time with each other!
• Not making our marriage a priority!
• Talking bad about our spouse, or marriage, to others!
• Not being intentional when it comes to investing in our marriage!

When it comes to that last one we wanted to give you some simple and easy to use resources for investing in each other!!! From previous episodes:

• Take the time to learn what makes your spouse feel loved by taking our "Relationship Needs Survey"! This is a real eye opener and will give you the keys to your mates heart! Click Here to access that episode!
• One of the most powerful things a couple can do is to work on creating a "Shared Vision" for their life together! In our episode on the subject we offered a downloadable pdf workbook to help you in the process! Click Here to access that episode and download your own Bucket List Exercise! WARNING ... it could lead to living full time in a RV or some similar life adventure!!!
• One more simple thing you can do to access a great resource is to join our YOUR Marriage Matters Facebook Group where we share a ton of additional information for building a more vibrant, healthy marriage! Click Here to go to our Facebook Group and join in!!!
• Oooooooppppssss! Almost forgot you can grab our book 52 Great Conversations for Building A More Vibrant, Healthy Marriage! Click Here to grab your copy!

So, make the commitment today to not allow any of these red flags to show up in your relationship without taking action in a proactive way! Obviously if we can help in any way let us know. E-mail us, message us or post your question on the Facebook Group! We are always here for you ...

Jim & Christie Jacobus

We are calling YOU out! But, we are calling ourselves out first!!!

We are frustrated, mostly Jim is frustrated, by what we perceive as a lack of interest people have in investing in their marriages! That is until they get into a crisis situation. That has made itself real to us many, many times through the years. That is why we began this podcast in the first place ... to keep couples out of Christie's counseling room and Jim's Divorce Care class!

Someone Is Getting Called Out! It Could Be You!!!

It seems to us like people, you maybe, don't care!!! While the podcast gets solid numbers in the way of downloads it has very little engagement in the way of comments or feedback on any of our distribution channels like YouTube, Facebook, ITunes and the rest. So, we are doing 2 things ...

• Calling ourselves out to be more engaged ourselves and do a better job of providing resources and promoting the podcast.
• Calling you, our listeners, viewers, friends and family out to become more intentional in providing us your feedback and engagement in this process!

In the podcast we also speak to what we feel like are the most important elements to building the marriage you dreamed of when you said "I Do"!

So, there you have it! You have been called out and we have called ourselves out as well! Join us in helping to build a more vibrant, healthy marriage for yourselves and for others.

Thanks! We love and appreciate each of you. Let us know how we can help you ...

Jim & Christie Jacobus

To live the "life of your dreams" you are going to have to make some big decisions! You may also have to change direction sometimes ... even when the direction you are going is exciting and compelling!!! The question is how do you go about making these types of decisions and/or change direction?

For a while now we have been using, and teaching, a process we came up with called I D E A! It goes like this ...

• Inspiration - you have a compelling idea.
• Discussion - you talk about it together and examine the pluses and the minuses with an open mind.
• Education - you learn as much as you can about the decision you want to make.
• Action - when the time comes (don't go too fast, or wait too long) you have to take action to make it happen!

We Made A BIG Decision! Another Life Lesson "From the Road"!!!

In this episode we walk you through our decision to become Park Hosts at Brazos Bend State Park near Houston, Texas! It was a bucket list item for the two of us yet there were a lot of things to consider. That said, we made the decision and we are so excited about our stay here!

Need to make a decision? Try I D E A out and let us know how it goes for you!!!

What is "travel day" like with Team Jacobus? What can we learn about marriage from how these two live out their full time RV'ing lifestyle?

Travel Day With Team Jacobus! (Some "Lessons From the Road")

It turns out, in this raw and uncut podcast, that there is a tone we can learn about the power of living out a dream and a shared vision! We can also learn a lot about how a ton of stuff has to get done and their approach to a shared workload!

Tune in and hear what "travel day" is like for Team Jacobus!

As we wrap up our "I Am Not the Enemy" series we look at what role do we play when it comes to dealing with conflict and struggles in a healthy and productive manner!

In this podcast we will share with you 6 positive roles we each play in the lives of our spouse and in the life of our marriage! Each of these roles lead to us successfully navigating the inevitable rough spots every relationship will experience!

Learning to embrace these strategies will not only help with problem solving but will absolutely lead to a marriage relationship each of you can count on!

Knowing you can trust your mate during tough times is a huge win and a part of why God created marriage in the first place!

We trust you will enjoy this episode. Let us know if we can help you and your marriage in any way ...

Challenges come at our relationship from one of two directions - outside forces of life just happening or inside the marriage where two imperfect people struggle with the give and take of growing up as a couple together!

In this Your marriage Matters episode 140 we get A Professional Counselor's Wisdom for Dealing With Conflict!

Christie has been a Licensed Professional Counselor, or LPC, for over a decade and currently serves clients via two online platforms ... Talkspace and BetterHelp! Her day begins and ends with helping individuals and couples deal with the inevitable conflict that comes with life.

In this episode she shares with us her formulas for helping couples navigate the oft times difficult waters.

We spend a good bit of our time discussing what to do when things seem impossible! So, grab a notebook and some paper because you will want to write some of this stuff down!

Come on over to the Your Marriage Matters  Facebook Group for more great content and a community of like minded folks by Clicking Here! 

Let us know if we can help you in your journey!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

This week we continue the "I Am Not the Enemy" series with YMM 139 ... Two Great Problem Solving Strategies You Can Use TODAY!

The are our two favorite , real world, techniques we use regularly when Team Jacobus is working our way through a difficulty or a when a not so clear decision needs to be made!

Struggles are part of the deal! Disagreements are part of the deal! Even arguing, when done in a healthy way, are a part of any deeply committed relationship! How we handle these normal parts of a normal relationship makes all of the difference in the world. These two techniques can help you turn conflict resolution into a marital strength and give you confidence in yourself, and in your relationship!

Enjoy ... and let us know if we can help in any way!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

When asked what is our best marital advice we always answer the same ... "Fight Naked"! While taken literally it can be a very effective methodology ... after all, who wants to fight with a naked person!

All kidding aside the NAKED part is an acronym for 5 great things to remember to keep our disagreements both civil and productive at the same time. The 5 steps look like this:

• N stands for "nothing up your sleeve" or no hidden agendas.
• A stands for "assume the best" which we went into in depth last week in podcast #137 ... Click Here for that episode!
• K stands for "keep things respectful"! I am not the enemy and deserve your respect even in a disagreement.
• E stands for "engage in creating a positive outcome" and be a serious problem solver looking for solutions.
• D stands for "decide on a plan of action" and move forward. Don't just leave problems hanging so that they pop up again and again!

Does this acronym help us in working through the inevitable problems and conflicts we run into as a couple? You bet it does! Are we perfect at it? Nope, not yet! But we want to be and we appreciate that we both want to be a part of the solution and "not the enemy"!

Let us know what you think about this episode and if you have any questions! Do us a favor when you have a few - like, subscribe and share this podcast with others! We would greatly appreciate it!

Problems, struggles and conflict are signs of a healthy relationship! Two imperfect people working to build a life together are bound to have struggles by the mere fact that:

• They are male and female
• Grew up in different households
• Have different personality styles Have different views on sex, money, household roles and responsibilities, parenting and a dozen other subjects

All of this and more means there will be conflict! What matters is how we handle it!!!

This entire month we will be following the theme of "I Am NOT the Enemy" (thanks Ben and Megan Coleman) and looking closely at effective strategies and mindsets for turning the inevitable differences we are going to have into a strength in our relationships!

Knowing we have each other's back and that we will process struggles in a positive and healthy way builds confidence in ourselves and in each other!  It isn't easy but it is well worth it!

Jim & Christie Jacobus 

What's up gang?

A few weeks ago in our podcast YMM 133 we introduced you to the subject of Relational Needs in a relationship and provided the resources for everyone to take the Relational Needs survey!

Click Here to access that podcast and the resources.

This episode we introduce you to Matt and Julie Barnhill of Barnhill Counseling and Associates, our friends, mentors and co-laborers in building more vibrant, healthy marriages, who will take our understanding of the subject to an entirely new level!

Did you know that there are needs that only God was intended to fulfill? Did you know that there are needs that only our spouse, and no one else, are intended to fulfill? And, did you know that we get into serious trouble when we get who fulfills what need mixed up?

Imagine expecting our loved one to meet a need only God can meet? It happens all of the time and is a recipe for disaster!!! There are some amazing insights in this podcast that can change the nature of our relationships, for the good and forever!

Please let us know if you need any help in this important area of your relationship. We would be glad to assist in any way we can.

To learn more about Matt, Julie and to connect with Barnhill and Associates Counseling Center Click Here! 

Matt & Julie Barnhill

As always we believe 100% that YOUR Marriage Matters! We want you to experience everything you hoped for when you said "I DO".

Hey gang ... 

It is the Wednesday after!!! After Valentine's Day, our 35th anniversary and, the launch of our first book YOUR Marriage Matters - 52 Great Conversations To Build A More Vibrant, Healthy Marriage! What a wild and crazy week this has been already and it is only Wednesday. WOW!

One of the things we got asked a lot on Valentine's Day is "what is the secret to staying married for 35 years"? We have been asked that question, or some version of it, a number of times through the years as we teach, counsel, coach and help folks like yourself work on making the most from their relationship! 

As we looked back ourselves, there were 4 key things we felt like really made the difference for us. We share them in this podcast with you! They are:

1. Commitment
2. Keep Learning
3. Work at intentionally being kind and loving
4. Create a compelling shared vision for your life together

So, watch the YouTube video (below) or download the podcast and take a listen. Know in the days, weeks, months and years ahead we will be speaking to these things many times. We appreciate your being on this journey with us!

Also, our first book launched this week! We are so excited that it is finally out ... YOUR Marriage Matters - 52 Great Conversations To Build A More Vibrant, Healthy Marriage is a book that will walk couples through important conversations every couple needs to process together. You can learn more about the book and how to order it right here on our website at  www.yourmarriagematters.com/52convos! If you have any questions please let us know.

As always, we are blessed that you would take the time to join us for the podcast. Know we are always here for you and glad to help!