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Your Marriage Matters

Hey gang! Welcome to Your Marriage Matters with Team Jacobus This podcast is dedicated to couples that want to get the most out of this crazy thing we call marriage! Each episode is designed to guide us in a fun and exciting way through the skills, strategies, tactics and mindset we need to build a compelling life together! Our goal is for all of us to create the vibrant and healthy marriages we all dreamed of when we said “I do”. Welcome to Your Marriage Matters with Jim and Christie Jacobus!
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Now displaying: Category: general, engaged, pre-married, seriously dating

"We Are Dedicated To Building Vibrant Healthy Marriages!"

Jul 6, 2023

In this exciting and fun episode, join our hosts as they sit down with two extraordinary couples, Mindy and Chris Harris, and Hannah and Austin Pierce. Get ready to delve into the depths of married life and uncover the invaluable experiences and wisdom these newlyweds have to share about their wedding day and everything that went into it!.

Discover the emotions as Jim & Christie ask the question, "How does it feel being married?" Listen in awe as Mindy and Chris, along with Hannah and Austin, paint a vivid picture of the transformative power of love and commitment, expressing their heartfelt sentiments and sharing the joys they have already found in marriage.

Journey with us as we delve into their wedding days, relishing in the details of these enchanting events. Explore the laughter and tears that accompanied them, and brace yourself for the surprises that left them breathless. Uncover the lessons they learned and the changes they would make if given the chance.

But it doesn't stop there! Be prepared to take notes as our guests provide invaluable advice for couples embarking on their own marital journeys. From the process to the preparation, and even the intricacies of the actual day itself, Mindy, Chris, Hannah, and Austin impart their hard-earned wisdom, ensuring that every couple has a head start towards a flourishing and meaningful union.

And as the episode draws to a close, we look toward the future and explore what lies ahead for these amazing couples. Find out the exciting new adventures, dreams, and aspirations that await Mindy, Chris, Hannah, and Austin. Their stories will leave you inspired and eager to embrace the infinite possibilities that marriage holds.

Tune in to "Your Marriage Matters" with Jim & Christie Jacobus, where love and commitment take center stage, and gain invaluable insights from these remarkable couples. Get ready to ignite the fire in your own relationship and witness firsthand how marriages truly matter. Don't miss a moment of this extraordinary podcast episode!

Jun 29, 2023

Last week we discussed Jim's favorite topic for a great marriage - mindsets! This week we look at Christie's fav topic - skill sets! One is worthless without the other so we trust you will enjoy! 

In this podcast you will discover the secrets to a thriving relationship on the latest episode of Your Marriage Matters podcast! Join relationship experts Jim & Christie Jacobus as they unveil the three essential skills that will revolutionize your love life.

In this episode, you will learn:

  • Effective Communication: Discover the key techniques to enhance communication with your partner, allowing for better understanding, active listening, and meaningful dialogue.

  • Conflict Resolution: Gain valuable insights on how to navigate conflicts in your relationship with grace and ease. Learn practical strategies to address disagreements constructively and find mutually satisfying resolutions.

  • The Power of Compassion: Explore the transformative power of compassion in your relationship. Discover how practicing empathy and understanding can foster deep connection, empathy, and intimacy.

With their years of expertise and practical advice, Jim & Christie will guide you towards a deeper connection and lasting happiness in your relationship.

Don't miss this opportunity to transform your relationship into something truly extraordinary. Tune in now and make your marriage matter!


Jim & Christie Jacobus

Jun 22, 2023

Welcome to YOUR Marriage Matters, where we explore the essential mindsets for a thriving and enduring marriage. In this episode, we'll dive into the 10 critical mindsets that form the foundation of a successful partnership.

  1. Commitment: Approach marriage with unwavering dedication and understand that it requires effort and perseverance. Cultivate a deep commitment to your partner and the relationship to ensure its strength and longevity.

  2. Communication: Prioritize open and honest communication. Actively listen to your partner's thoughts, feelings, and needs, and express yourself clearly and respectfully. Effective communication is vital for understanding, connection, and resolving conflicts.

  3. Empathy: Cultivate empathy to understand your partner's perspective, emotions, and experiences. Foster a sense of understanding and compassion. Empathy strengthens the bond between partners and nurtures a supportive and harmonious relationship.

  4. Respect: Treat your partner with respect, valuing their opinions, boundaries, and individuality. Avoid criticism, contempt, or disrespect. Mutual respect lays the groundwork for trust, appreciation, and a healthy dynamic.

  5. Teamwork: Embrace a teamwork mentality, recognizing that you and your partner are a united front working towards common goals. Support each other through challenges, celebrate victories together, and foster a sense of partnership and unity.

  6. Compromise: Master the art of compromise. Find solutions that benefit both partners and be willing to make concessions when conflicts arise. Maintaining harmony and balance through compromise is essential for a thriving marriage.

  7. Gratitude: Practice gratitude for your partner and the relationship. Acknowledge and appreciate their positive qualities and the efforts they make to enhance the marriage. Cultivating gratitude fosters a positive and appreciative mindset.

  8. Forgiveness: Cultivate the ability to forgive and let go of past grievances. Recognize that nobody is perfect, and holding onto resentment hinders the growth of the relationship. Forgiveness allows healing and renewal within the marriage.

  9. Adaptability: Embrace flexibility and adaptability as life circumstances change. Be willing to adjust and navigate those changes together as a couple. An adaptable mindset ensures resilience and growth in the face of challenges.

  10. Continuous Growth: Commit to personal and relational growth. Recognize that a successful marriage requires ongoing effort, learning, and self-improvement. Embrace opportunities for growth individually and as a couple to strengthen your bond.

By adopting these 10 critical mindsets, you can lay a solid foundation for a successful and fulfilling marriage. Embrace commitment, effective communication, empathy, respect, teamwork, compromise, gratitude, forgiveness, adaptability, and continuous growth. Subscribe to YOUR Marriage Matters for more insights and practical guidance on building a thriving and lasting marriage.

See you next week for the "skills" episode! 

Jim & Christie Jacobus

 

Jun 8, 2023

Are you ready to take your relationship to the next level? Join hosts Jim and Christie Jacobus on their podcast, Your Marriage Matters, where they share valuable insights and practical advice on building a strong and prosperous marriage. In this episode, they uncover the secrets to healthy financial habits for engaged or seriously dating couples.

Money can be a sensitive subject, but Jim and Christie are here to guide you through the journey of financial harmony. They emphasize the importance of open and honest communication about money. By discussing your financial goals, priorities, and concerns regularly, you can ensure that you and your partner are on the same page.

Conflicts may arise, but fear not! Jim and Christie reveal the keys to conflict resolution when it comes to finances. They encourage couples to create a safe space to discuss differences in financial values, priorities, and approaches. Through active listening, compromise, and finding common ground, you can resolve disagreements and prevent financial issues from straining your relationship.

Ready to take control of your finances? The dynamic duo shares their wisdom on budgeting. By creating a joint budget that reflects both partners' income, expenses, and savings goals, you can avoid unnecessary financial stress and set yourselves up for success.

But financial success isn't just about the numbers. Jim and Christie emphasize the significance of shared financial goals. Whether it's saving for a dream house, retirement, or a well-deserved vacation, they guide you on how to work together, align your efforts, and make joint decisions to achieve these goals.

While working towards shared goals, it's equally important to maintain individual financial independence. Jim and Christie empower you to have personal spending money and be involved in managing your own finances, fostering a healthy balance in your relationship.

Unexpected expenses are inevitable, so be prepared! The hosts advocate for building an emergency fund together. Aim for three to six months' worth of living expenses and contribute to it regularly, ensuring peace of mind in times of financial uncertainty.

Debt can be a burden, but it doesn't have to be. Jim and Christie reveal strategies for debt management. Tackle existing debts as a team, prioritizing high-interest debts first. By avoiding new debt whenever possible, you can pave the way for a debt-free future.

Looking ahead, Jim and Christie stress the importance of saving for the future. Whether it's exploring retirement account options like 401(k)s, IRAs, or pension plans, or starting to save early to take advantage of compounding growth, they guide you on investing in your future together.

Regular financial check-ins are vital to staying on track. Jim and Christie advise scheduling these check-ins to assess your progress, adjust goals, and make any necessary changes. By staying accountable and adapting to new circumstances, you'll keep your financial journey on the right path.

Trust and transparency go hand in hand, especially when it comes to finances. Jim and Christie emphasize the need for maintaining transparent financial records. Sharing access to bank accounts, investment portfolios, and other financial accounts fosters trust and ensures that both partners have a clear understanding of the overall financial picture.

Finally, never stop learning. Jim and Christie encourage you to commit to ongoing financial education as a couple. Attend workshops, read books, or take courses together to enhance your knowledge about personal finance and investment strategies. This shared learning experience will strengthen your financial decision-making as a team.

Don't miss out on the wealth of knowledge shared by Jim and Christie on Your Marriage Matters. Tune in to their podcast today and discover the secrets to building a strong and financially secure marriage.

Jun 1, 2023

Welcome to another episode of Your Marriage Matters, the podcast where we explore the keys to a successful and fulfilling marriage. I'm your host, Jim Jacobus, and I'm joined by my wonderful co-host and partner, Christie Jacobus.

Summary: In today's episode, we dive into the essential elements of a healthy relationship. We'll discuss effective communication, healthy conflict resolution, mutual respect, emotional support, quality time, boundaries and independence, shared responsibilities, physical intimacy, emotional resilience, and mutual goals and growth. These elements form the foundation of a thriving and lasting marriage.

Key Points:

  1. Effective Communication: Open and honest communication is crucial for couples. We explore the importance of active listening, expressing thoughts and emotions clearly, and avoiding defensive or aggressive behavior. Communication lays the groundwork for understanding and connection in your relationship.

  2. Healthy Conflict Resolution: Disagreements and conflicts are inevitable in any relationship. We'll share valuable insights on cultivating healthy conflict resolution skills, such as active listening, compromise, and finding solutions together. By addressing conflicts constructively, you can strengthen your bond and grow together.

  3. Mutual Respect: Respect is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. We emphasize the significance of respecting each other's opinions, boundaries, and individuality. We'll provide tips on recognizing and appreciating each other's strengths and differences, fostering a sense of harmony and appreciation.

  4. Emotional Support: During challenging times, emotional support is vital. We'll discuss the importance of being empathetic, understanding, and offering reassurance and encouragement to each other. Discover how to navigate difficult moments as a team and build a strong foundation of emotional support.

  5. Quality Time: Spending quality time together is essential for maintaining a thriving marriage. We delve into the significance of regular shared activities that both partners enjoy, fostering connection and intimacy. Discover ways to prioritize quality time and strengthen your bond.

  6. Boundaries and Independence: Maintaining personal boundaries and respecting each other's need for space and individuality is key to a healthy relationship. We discuss the importance of encouraging each other's personal growth and interests while fostering a sense of togetherness and support.

  7. Shared Responsibilities: Establishing a fair division of household chores, financial responsibilities, and decision-making promotes a sense of equality and reduces stress. We provide strategies for effectively managing shared responsibilities, creating a balanced and harmonious partnership.

  8. Physical Intimacy: Physical affection, intimacy, and sexual connection are vital aspects of a healthy relationship. We delve into the significance of open communication about desires, needs, and boundaries, creating a safe and fulfilling space for physical intimacy.

  9. Emotional Resilience: Cultivating emotional resilience as a couple is essential for navigating challenging times. We explore strategies for supporting each other during difficult moments, promoting self-care practices, and seeking professional help when needed. Discover how to build emotional strength as a team.

  10. Mutual Goals and Growth: Setting shared goals, dreams, and aspirations is a powerful way to strengthen your bond. We discuss the importance of supporting each other's personal growth and celebrating achievements together. Explore how mutual goals can enhance your connection and create a fulfilling future.

Building a strong foundation for your marriage requires attention to these essential elements: effective communication, healthy conflict resolution, mutual respect, emotional support, quality time, boundaries and independence, shared responsibilities, physical intimacy, emotional resilience, and mutual goals and growth. By prioritizing these elements, you can create a lasting and fulfilling partnership. Thank you for joining us on Your Marriage Matters. We look forward to bringing you more valuable insights and discussions in future episodes. Remember, your marriage truly matters.

YMM Cover art

JIm & Christie Jacobus

 

May 25, 2023

Does your physical health impact the health of your relationship? Simple answer - absolutely!

Join us on a journey to prioritize your physical health as a couple and strengthen your bond like never before. We are thrilled to present ten essential habits that will revolutionize your approach to physical well-being. Are you ready to embark on this exciting adventure together?

1️⃣ Regular Exercise Together: Discover the joy of shared physical activities. Whether it's taking leisurely walks, cycling, swimming, dancing, or joining a fitness class, exercising as a couple not only improves your physical health but also deepens the connection between you.

2️⃣ Meal Planning and Cooking Together: Unleash your culinary creativity and plan nutritious meals as a team. Engage in grocery shopping, meal prepping, and cooking to transform these activities into fun and collaborative endeavors.

3️⃣ Healthy Eating Habits: Embrace a balanced diet with an abundance of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats. Bid farewell to processed foods, sugary drinks, excessive salt, and sugar consumption to embark on a healthier lifestyle together.

4️⃣ Regular Sleep Schedule: Create a sleep routine that nourishes your bodies and minds. Prioritize getting enough sleep each night by cultivating a relaxing environment and developing nighttime rituals that promote restful slumber.

5️⃣ Active Weekend Outings: Embrace the beauty of the outdoors by planning exhilarating weekend activities like hiking, cycling, kayaking, or exploring new places. As you immerse yourselves in physical activity, you'll forge unforgettable memories together.

6️⃣ Active Date Nights: Break free from the mundane and infuse your date nights with energy. Opt for active adventures like bowling, mini-golf, or dance classes. By embracing physical activity, you'll add excitement and variety to your relationship.

7️⃣ Team Sports or Recreational Leagues: Rediscover the thrill of friendly competition as you join local sports teams or recreational leagues together. This fantastic opportunity not only keeps you active but also allows you to expand your social circle.

8️⃣ Regular Health Check-ups: Prioritize your well-being by scheduling routine check-ups with healthcare professionals. By staying vigilant and catching potential issues early, you can ensure a healthier future for both of you.

9️⃣ Fitness Challenges or Goals: Unleash your inner athlete by setting fitness goals or challenges as a couple. Train for a charity run, participate in fitness challenges, or aim to reach a specific number of steps or workout sessions per week. Together, you can achieve greatness.

🔟 Support Each Other's Wellness: Stand as pillars of strength and support each other's physical health journeys. Be the accountability partner your partner deserves, encouraging and motivating one another to stay consistent with exercise, healthy eating, and overall well-being.

Remember, your physical health is a team effort. By embarking on this transformative podcast journey with us, you'll discover the power of supporting and motivating each other. Together, you can create a positive and healthy lifestyle that not only benefits both individuals but also strengthens the unbreakable bond you share as a couple.

Tune in to Your Marriage Matters with Jim and Christie Jacobus, where we'll delve into each habit and provide practical strategies to incorporate them into your lives. Let's make your marriage thrive through the power of physical health!

Jim & Christie "Team" Jacobus

May 18, 2023

Welcome to "The Relationship Blueprint: Mastering 5 Habits for Sustained Success!" with your hosts, Jim and Christie Jacobus! Join us for an exciting podcast episode where we explore the fascinating world of habits and how they can shape your life.

In this special series spanning five weeks (and possibly more!), we'll guide you on a journey towards building incredible habits that will amplify the magic in your relationship. Are you ready to make your dreams a reality?

Our first habit is all about fostering strong communication through regularly scheduled weekly "team" meetings. Discover the immense benefits of setting aside dedicated time to align your visions, discuss goals, and support each other's aspirations. We'll share practical insights and a suggested agenda to help you get started.

Tune in and embark on this transformative adventure with us. Together, we'll unlock the potential of habits and create an extraordinary future that surpasses your expectations.

Join Jim and Christie Jacobus on "Habits Unleashed" - the podcast that empowers you to shape your destiny, one habit at a time. Let's dive in!

Jim & Christie "Team" Jacobus

Mar 19, 2015

Welcome to 

5 Fun Date Night Questions

- YMM #009

 

 

Hey gang! We wanted to shift gears a little bit and have a little fun so we came up with 5 "Date Night" questions you can ask each other and just have a conversation that doesn't go anywhere but help you learn some cool stuff about each other! Maybe it will help you win "The Newlywed Game" someday!

Enjoy these conversations and put your answers in the comments section below!

1.     Best concert ever?

 

2.     What is your best memory of when we first started dating?

 

3.     What are 5 reasons why you love me?

 

4.     What is your favorite sport to watch? What is your favorite sport to play?

 

5.     If you could have a fantasy dinner party and invite any 4 guests you wanted to … where would you go to eat, what would be served, and who would your guests be?

 

What we wish for you, our listeners, is hope for your future and a great relationship and marriage if you are headed in that direction.  The key to this is great communication with each other.  So have some fun with these questions and a great date night!

 

Jim & Christie Jacobus

 

Your Marriage Matter

Mar 12, 2015

Your Marriage Matters - Podcast #008

What is our conversation of the week?

What are the 5 things you like about how you were raised and why do you like those things?

Here are a few thoughts about why this is an important conversation for pre-married couples and seriously dating couples to have;

  • Every bit of who we are today comes from how we grew up! Insights into what we liked about that can give us ideas about how we can make our relationship a happy one!
  • This helps you learn about your partner even deeper, their personal history and what really matters to them.  Through this you can explore your similarities and differences and work through those early in the relationship.
  • Can just be interesting stuff to hear and satisfies our curiosity about the person we are going to spend the rest of our lives with!
  • If you understand what has created positive memories for your partner in the past, and if you are listening; you can hear how you can make them happy in the future!
  • Become aware of and sensitive to subjects like an unhappy childhood and dig in deep on what made each other happy growing up.  Great insights to be gained here.

Listener Question of the Week – We are starting to get serious in our dating relationship and marriage may be on the horizon. I would like to get to know my future in-laws better. What ideas do you have for making that happen?

Thanks for joining us this week gang.  We sincerely hope that you are enjoying and growing in your relationships from these conversations. 

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Mar 5, 2015

Your Marriage Matters

 

Welcome to Episode #007 of YMM.  Can’t believe we are headed in to our second month of these great conversations!

 

Today’s conversation of the week is:

 

How will household chores and responsibilities be handled?

 

 There is a lot to do around even the smallest of households.  So, who is going to be responsible for what can be important?

 Is the old style model of “the man does this” and the “little woman does this” antiquated?

 Important to figure out what is a fair division of labor depending on career responsibilities.

 Talk about your values concerning your home and what it should look like.

 Consider hiring out whatever you both don’t like to do or can’t get around to as you can afford to! 

 

Listener Question of the Week – I have very high standards for how our home should look and my fiancé does not share my views. What should we do?

 

Fun Question of the Week – What is your favorite date night activity?

 

We challenge each of you to take the time to have this important conversation this week and don’t forget to send your questions and comments to us.

 

 

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 26, 2015

Hey gang …

We have another great conversation topic for you this week!

If you were given an extra hour in a day,

what would you do with it?

 

This is a great conversation for couples to have…

·      It can really help us understand what we value, which can definitely be enlightening!

·      It can remind us that there are finite amounts of things we have control over and one of those is our time and how we spend it.

·      If you first talk about what your goals for your marriage are, then “what you do with your time” can be a better conversation.

·      There will be seasons in our lives where time needs to be used differently but no matter what stage you are in, how you choose to spend your time individually and together is important.

·      Are you investing time…or are you killing time?

·      In discussing how we choose to use our time, it is important to explore if we feel the need to get too many things accomplished in a day and are we making sure to save time to rest and relax.

·      One of the struggles can be finding a balance between what we “want” to do and what we “need” to do.  Do you make sure to carve out time to simply be together?

 

Our Listener Question of the Week” is:

My fiancée is very spontaneous and I am much more of a planner.  How do we resolve the problems created by this?

Our Fun Question of the Week” is:

List one fun activity you would like to try.

Listen in to the podcast and get Jim and Christie’s answers to these as well as more information about their insights on “time”.  That’s it for podcast #006. Have some fun with this conversation and continue committing to growing your very own healthy, vibrant, life long marriage!

Sincerely,

 

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 20, 2015

Welcome everyone to Your Marriage Matters (YMM) podcast #004! 

Conversation of the Week: Who has been the biggest influence on the person you have become?  Why?  How?  We all come in to relationships bringing with us people and places that have been influential in our lives.  This is a great conversation to have early in a relationship.  Some influences have been good, yet some have been bad and understanding those plus and minuses helps us understand what makes each other tick. 

According to our good friend Randy Gage, “we are the sum total of the 5 people we spend the most time with”.  Think of parents and friends while you were growing up, we are kind of the average of those people.  Another thing to talk about is that we bring with us family and influences when we start a relationship and getting to know this information helps us understand what we love about each other as well as things we may struggle with.  It is important to know about the negative influences in each other’s lives as well because they definitely have a huge impact on who we have become. 

The other part to this conversation is becoming very aware of who we let in to our lives going forward, both individually and as a couple.  Build friendships that will help you grow as a couple.  In going through this conversation, it is important to remember that you are not chained to your past.  As you start a life together, it is like unpacking and repacking your bags.  Become a student of each other, learn who they are and why. 

 In going through this conversation, be aware that it is very critical to learn to trust each others judgment about the people you choose to hang out with.  Also if there are any relationships you bring in to the marriage that is strained for one of you, talk about it and work through it early on.

 Listener Question of the Week?  Is it a problem if we have very different childhood experiences?  I

Fun Question of the Week? Name the person you would most like to meet.

Homework for the weekTalk about the 5 people who are currently the most influential in your life and why.

Talk with you next time,

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 19, 2015

Hey gang ...

Great conversation for everyone this week! 

What were the prevalent faith and belief systems in your home growing up?

This is a critical conversation for a couple of reasons ...

  1. Important to know what they are and how they might impact our marriages moving forward!
  2. We want to make sure that there aren't any "deal breakers" and if so now is the time to talk about them!

Some of our thoughts on this subject are;

  • The fact that we might have differing belief systems or faiths can be an issue in the success of our marriage!
  • They can also bring strengths to our lives moving forward.
  • Learning to respect and appreciate our backgrounds as a part of who we are is an important lesson to learn in a number of areas including this one!

Our "Listener Question of the Week" is;

We attended one of your "Prepare To Last" classes and clearly going to church is what you do! Why do you think going to church is so important?

So, that's it for podcast #005. Now go and enjoy this conversation this week and continue committing to growing your very own healthy, vibrant, life long marriage!

Sincerely,

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 16, 2015

YOUR MARRIAGE MATTERS

Let’s Talk About Sex Baby!

YMM #003

Welcome to Your Marriage Matters podcast #003 with Jim & Christie Jacobus.  We have a great question today.  We are going to talk about sex and how important that conversation is! 

Our conversation of the week is: I think sex should occur ______ number of times per week! 

We think this conversations is so important because sex is more to this questions than just about sex, it is also about expectations.  Discussing this topic in our pre-marital classes we always point out that “sex is a lot like money, if you have all you want it is no big problem; if you don’t have all you want it is a huge problem”. 

In one of our sessions there was a person who responded with 50 times per week, which truly is an unrealistic expectation.  The intended partner answered with 2 times per week.  As you can see by this example, discussions about sex and expectations is so important. 

We should learn to freely discuss this topic, what we like and dislike, what our expectations are.  One of the great things about sex is it brings us together as one, therefore we should be able to discuss this keeping in mind our differences as male and female as well as the unique individuals we are. 

We want to help you get comfortable with this very difficult conversation as well as many more like it.  Coming from a medical standpoint there are times when a physical or mental challenge presents itself, and those times need to be discussed as well or see the need for expert advise.  Bottom line, sex is a wonderful gift we need to be able to talk about and how we treat this gift has a lot to do with how much we are able to enjoy the gift.

There are a few things/hurdles we need to be aware of during this conversation?  Differences, beliefs, attitudes can affect this conversation.  There can be things in one’s past that makes it difficult to discuss or painful.  It is important to be respectful of that. 

Another thing to contemplate is the old saying “women need to feel love to have sex and men need to have sex to feel love”.  If we are selfish and self centered, in opposite corners of the ring on this, theen nobody gets what they want and need out of sex. 

Here is our “Listener Question of the Week”?

We have been told that we should stop having sex for 90 days before we get married.  What do you guys think about this? 

Tune in to hear what Jim and Christie have to say about this awesome question!

If you have a question you would like to give us, go to www.your marriage-matter.com/qif

Our “Fun Question of the Week”?

Would you prefer a vacation in Hawaii or Europe? 

In closing, thanks for joining us for this podcast.  We sincerely challenge you to commit to each other that you will take the time to have these types of difficult and important conversations and your relationship will continue to get better, because Your Marriage Matters! 

 Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 16, 2015

Welcome gang to Your Marriage Matters (YMM) podcast #002!

 Conversation of the Week: What are your plans to handle money after you are married?  This can definitely be a very difficult conversation.  It is critical because it is one of the tough ones and it sets up so many important things down the road.  Having a plan regarding your financial resources is key for having a successful marriage. 

Questions such as who is going to handle the bill paying and will you have joint or separate checking accounts is a good place to start in order to have clear expectations.  Whether you have a lot or a little, learning to manage money together will help in avoiding it becoming a problem.  Exploring how you each grew up around money, what did and didn’t work, and your own philosophies regarding money is a great exercise in communication and can help in the decision making. 

Make sure it isn’t just about the facts and figures, but also the attitudes and beliefs about money.  Budget, budget, budget….extremely important in your plan for money matters.  This creates an awareness that can help avoid stress and it creates a co-awareness that is ideal for being a successful couple. 

 If you are struggling with this conversation, be aware that each of you may come at this differently and that doesn’t mean that either of you is wrong.  Realize that you have to be open and transparent and that in doing so it will make your marriage stronger.  Because if you can handle this tough one, you will know that you have good communication skills and that you are developing some great conflict resolution skills!  One thing we highly recommend is that no matter what system you use to handle money, passwords on those accounts should be not be private.  Don’t create financial infidelity!

 Listener Question of the Week?  Money is very tight for us right now, so what is one piece of advice you would give couples on a limited budget?  

Fun Question of the Week? What is the one item you like to splurge on?  

Homework for the weekAnswer and talk about these questions:

  • -Are you a spender or a saver?
  • -What plan are you going to have for a budget?

Talk with you next time,

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 14, 2015

Your Marriage Matters

Podcast Zero!

Meet the Jacobus’

 

Welcome to the very first Your Marriage Matters (YMM) podcast! We are so excited about launching this, so we are doing it TODAY on Valentine’s Day which is also our anniversary! 

In this inaugural podcast, we want to answer 3 very important questions:

  • -Who are the Jacobus’?
  • -What is this podcast about?
  • -Why should you as a seriously dating couple or engaged to be married couple care?

Who Are The Jacobus’? – We are Jim & Christie and have been married for 28 years on 2/14/2015.  We live in Sugar Land, Texas just outside of Houston.  One of the struggles we have had together has been with infertility; however we do have 1 son from Jim’s previous marriage so we are blessed.  Our son, Jason, is 30 years old and is married to an awesome bride Caitlyn. They have one son Loklan and another child is due in August! 

Christie is a nurse that works for the Memorial Hermann system where she is a nurse educator.  She is also an LPC (Licensed Professional Counselor) with Barnhill & Associated Counseling Center.  Christie focuses on working with married couples but her biggest passion is “pre-marrieds”!  Guys you are going to love listening to Christie because she brings a sweet, passionate, and patient voice to the podcast. 

Jim is a CSP, Certified Professional Speaker, and speaks at conferences literally all over the world!  He is also the Chief Content Officer at TheSalesGladiators.com which is a membership sales training site for sales professionals.  Jim has been heavily involved in teaching Divorce Care for several years and loves leading that study and giving people hope for their future!  You are going to love hearing from Jim because of his dedication, expertise, and passion for marriage.

What is this podcast about? – You can find these podcasts on ITunes and www.yourmarriage-matters.com.  Not only are we going sharing information with you via the podcasts, but we will also be blogging!  Each week the podcast comes straight from our book 101 Conversations Every Couple Should Have Before They Get Married!  These questions come from 10 different categories we cover when we teach our pre-married workshops and conferences.  Some are going to be fairly easy and some could be a little difficult. 

We will be encouraging you to have conversations about things like communications, conflict resolution, money, sex, family, parenting, roles and responsibilities and much, much more!  Each week we will introduce a conversation from the book, talk about why that conversation matters, give you some guidelines for having the conversation, and let you know if there are any hurdles you should watch out for.  Then we are going to answer 1 listener question each week from you guys so bring on your toughest questions!  To leave a question go to www.yourmarriage-matters.com/qif and let us know what you want to know!  And then we will send you off with a fun question to deal with as well!

So, Why should you care? - We have been involved in marriage work for the last 15 years and the two biggest challenges we see in failed marriages are:

  • -Inability to communicate – transparently, openly, and safely about any and every thing
  • -Inability to solve problems or resolve conflict within the marriage 

We chose this route because we care about you and your marriage and we thought this would be the best way to help keep you out of the counselors office and out of divorce court and most importantly help you build a healthy and vibrant marriage that lasts a lifetime!

In closing, Christie’s hope for everyone listening is that they will learn and grow and develop the skills needed to have the marriage you dream of.  And Jim hopes to share that marriage is indeed challenging but when done properly it can be the most fulfilling thing ever - being invested in each other’s life because it doesn’t get much better than that.  We care about you and your marriages and want you to build a lasting legacy that will be passed down to your children and their children.

Hope you enjoy this first podcast and begin looking forward to what’s coming up.

Jim & Christie Jacobus

Feb 6, 2015

Hey folks ...

Welcome to our very first podcast! We are launching this show on Valentine's Day 2015 which just happens to be our 28th wedding anniversary! Yep, we were married 28 years ago today in a hot air baloon and felt it would be fitting to kick off the podcast as an anniversary gift to each other.

In this week's podcast we are going to tackle the conversation - "What are your plans for growth, both personally and professionally, individually and as a couple, after you get married! Having an understanding of and a plan for continual growth after you "tie the knot" is critical to a vibrant, healthy relationship.

So, listen to the podcast and then sit down and have your discussion. We think you will find it valuable to know what each other has in mind as far as long term growth is concerned!

The Listener Question of the Week - What are the Jacobus' plans for growing in 2015?

Enjoy your conversation this week!

Jim & Christie Jacobus

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